observation
Whether people admit it or not, apologetics, i.e. defense of ones beliefs, are everywhere.  Just as the devout Christian will defend his or her faith, an agnostic or atheist will explain their unbelief.
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a·pol·o·get·ics

(ə-pŏl'ə-jět'ĭks)    n.   (used with a sing. verb) The branch of theology that is concerned with defending or proving the truth of Christian doctrines. Formal argumentation in defense of something, such as a position or system.

The American Heritage® Dictionary of the English Language, Fourth Edition
Copyright © 2009 by Houghton Mifflin Company.
Published by Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.
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Moving on...

new year's stuff

fitness- day one
Attempted to exercise using wii fit.  Bear took her turn and then got mad when I took over for myself.  Buddy tried to climb on me and the balance board.  I think I got about 6 minutes of hula hoop in along with my body test.. but at least it said my Wii age=my real age!  Set up "My Fitness Trainer" game profile (age, weight, measurements, etc...) while kids ate a snack.  Did 30 minutes tonight.... tried the yoga on it... like the Wii fit yoga better... way better for telling novices like myself how to do the poses....  did 15 minute cardio workout and 15 minute core strength workout on the Fitness Trainer.  I like it overall... takes personal data and tries to give you an appropriate workout, also asks you how you felt about segments (too easy, made me sweat, too hard).  After the kids were in bed, of course.  Now to get hubby to set up a profile.  :)  I will definitely keep using the Fit for some activities, but the new addition to my limited repetoire raises my heart rate better.

time management- day two
I am completely opposed to over-structuring.  I am also indecisive and often get stuck trying to decide what task to tackle first.  I used a planner through college, somewhere along the way it got buried.  Plus, the Franklin Covey was just too bulky.. even the smaller one that I had.  Not to mention costly.

My little mead planner is working out well so far.  :)  Enough room to jot down what I need to, not enough to be overwhelming.  And it's cheerfully cute.  It invites me to use it.  And the pic reminds me of relaxing, fun times with the family.

Intentional parenting-
Bear is gung ho about her Job Chart/Job Jar reward system that we are trying out.  While trying to set an example through my actions, I am also encouraging her to be more responsible. (That's part of what's behind my whole attempt at some organization and self-dicipline without legalism.  How can I expect her to be responsible if I am on Facebook all day when I should be spending quality time with her, her brother, getting SOMETHING, anything done, etc...)
She even asked to help me fold laundry today.  Sheets.  That was fun.  Oh, but she did fold a washcloth that had stuck to her clothes AND put it in the laundry pile in the living room.  During Buddy's nap time we played Chutes and Ladders, ending with going over the #'s 1-100, since they are on the game board.  Not sure if she really liked the game or not... maybe we should have gone with candyland.


Little by little....

new year, new me... sort of

As you see here, I bought a planner for the year.  I did not want an expensive Franklin Covey or anything like that, but I wanted something that was fun to look at... something that would inspire me to open it up.  I found this at Wal-Mart, for about $6.  And I love the little photo sleeve!  It has just what I need... month at a glance and lines for my to make small lists of what I want to accomplish during the week.

I made a list before I went to bed last night. then I actually did 4/6 of the things on that list today.  It feels good to see check marks next to the things I got done, and to realize there were things I did that were not on the list at all.

I've got a multitude of thoughts running through my head.  You might catch glimpses of them on here if I post more than once a week, or if they make it to my Facebook status.  My track record with New Year's resolutions is pretty spoor, so I think I'll cling to Micah 6:8 and hope for a little bit of Proverbs 31 in there somewhere.

We had a wonderful Christmas, and you?

It feels more like fall than winter here in the South.  I have to admit that while I would enjoy a good snowfall, I like being able to use medium coats at most... all that bundling up must be a pain with little ones!

The sky is clear, sun is shining, and kiddos are out of trouble.  :)  Mostly.

I've got some ponderings and wanderings in my brain, but not ready to post them all.

Still investigating home-buying options...  big payment for what we would like and all that responsibility are not appealing when you have maintenance on call and are able to spend/save with less stress.

The kids and I are hoping to visit some friends who I knew in college.  We weren't super close, but I am enjoying getting to know them online, and have been praying for them during their adoption journey.  They live in IN now, but were matched with a baby here and are staying a little over an hour away til they are cleared to go home.  Yay!!! They have had quite the roller-coaster ride and I am so excited for them as they have been longing to be parents for so long! 

still dreaming/drooling/praying :)

Ok, so I am SO obsessed with one neighborhood that I took the map of the lots  that was given to me and wrote an S on the ones that are sold as listed online, and made notes on the ones I am curious about.  I even labelled the lots that border the 100 year flood plain.  Ha!  I think I will e-mail the sales rep and ask for a link to the CC&R's.  I did see someone with a garden in their back yard.... not just containers, a real garden.

I REALLY want a place that is big enough for family to come visit and not have to stay in a motel/hotel/campsite/the driveway.  It doesn't have to be huge, just have enough rooms to work with, you know? 

Of course, technically hubby has not done a lot of actual work with his new job yet, and technically we don't like the commute, so we should technically probably wait to jump into home ownership again. (and the only way the commute would be better is to move to an entirely different metro area.)  Thanksgiving at Caslon's made me itch for breathing room, well, outside at least.  We were kind of crowded inside, but that's just cozy when you are with the people you love.   And honestly, they have ample space for daytime, it's just sleeping that gets tricky when all of us invade.

so now I am praying for wisdom... when, where, etc...  that tax rebate is sounding mighty attractive.  I am loving quaint things about the town we have currently chosen for now.  Perhaps we SHOULD drive around and consider other areas, but I am itching to feel settled.

However, the good news is that hubby will be home with us on Tuesday.  Tech Mom and Dad are coming tonight, and we'll drive down to where hubby is tomorrow.  Graduation is Monday.  Yahoo!  I am so proud of him and ready to have him home! 

"Dream Building"

So, a few years ago, when we were first married, we were conned, I mean lured, I mean naive enough to get into an MLM company that was big into "dream building."   The problem with the particular company was that it was all about recruitment, sales of their products were secondary to recruitment.  Um, sorry, but ya gotta have a customer base to be able to earn those commissions, etc...

ANYWAY, one of the things we liked to do was walk through various homes in neighborhoods that were way out of our price range.  We were living with my in-laws at the time, and the dream of more space (although our space really was adequate and the savings we made by living with them while hubby finished his degree was priceless), well, it was fun.

One of our pastimes is still looking at homes, moreso now that we are in an apartment and I am getting stir crazy.

The problem?  The ones that are built to our desires for quality and space are either way too pricey or in the wrong school zone.  But we found one yesterday that had a perfect big yard with plenty of room for the kiddos to roam... the high school it is zoned to is the best in the county, the elementary and middle schools are not.  :( The floor plan is not perfect, but would be workable, and it's in a small neighborhood on a beautiful cul-de-sac, FLAT lot.  CLICK HERE to drool.

Other good points?  5-10 minutes from the interstate AND our pediatricians and grocery shopping.
Immaculately built, lots of extras included, like extra shelving in the master closet, tile backsplash in kitchen and master bath.... family run company that according to the State website of business registration has been around since '63, and the realtor we met was also the VP of the company/builder. 

So then there was another neighborhood, not far from this one, a little bit further down a countrier road.  Another regional builder, similar style homes and lots, significantly lower price point... but when we looked up that company, even though the sales rep said he had been around for a while, according to the state this particular business entity must have restructured because the date listed was much "younger."  However, that being said, this company actually offers homes in our preferred price range. 

Hubby looked in the attics of both builders' homes..... looked well constructed compared to the ones we looked in in Woodstock last month.

We're not in a rush, per se, but after walking through spacious homes I feel a bit stir crazy and cramped in my cozy apartment.

improvisation

What do you do when you have an idea for a project but lack the exact things or measurements you need? When it comes to cooking, I improvise. (When it comes to other things, I just put it off until it becomes a distant memory of an idea.) Well, between my searches for Christmas activities and friends' status updates and links on FB, and considering the fact that many of our beloved Christmas ornaments are in storage and will probably stay there this year, I thought we could make some ornaments of our own this year. Specifically: cinnamon applesauce ornaments.

I had applesauce in the fridge and cinnamon in the cupboard, so I should be all set, right? The problem was I did not have the exact amounts that any of the recipes called for. The simplest one said one part cinnamon to one part applesauce. I tried that. It was sticky. That's where the improvisation came in. I added flour. I should say, Bear and I added flour. So while I can't give you the exact recipe if you are interested, I can tell you that our mission was accomplished. We mixed applesauce, cinnamon, and flour and kneaded it to make a "cookie dough." We rolled the dough out flat on our cutting board, and used the only two cookie cutters that I could find to make bells and stars. (They happened to be in the play-dough kit. The other ornaments are probably buried in storage somewhere.) Conveniently, our tree is tiny, so the size should work out perfectly. We had to keep sprinkling with flour to keep the dough from sticking, but in the end we came out with at least 20 shapes. After we placed them on a foil-covered cookie sheet, I took a skinny straw and punched a hole in the shapes. I baked them on 200 for about 20 minutes, turned them over, then baked them for 20 more minutes. they are cooling on the stove, and the best part is the house smells wonderful!

 Now Bear wants to make cookies we can actually eat.  She tasted this dough and said it's kind of yummy but mostly yucky.

The ornaments were still slightly doughy on the bottom, which turned out useful for making the holes a little bit bigger on about half of them. 
Another plus side to this recipe it's non-toxic, so if a 15 month old gets ahold of one and decides to munch on it, no harm done.

giving thanks (what a difference 4 years makes)

Our holiday rotation has brought us back to Caslon and Camera Guy's home. As I sit and type this, and hubby cradles our youngest niece, I can't help but flash back to what simultaneously seems like it was centuries ago and not so long ago.

4 years ago... Bear was 1 month old. Hubby was at training. I was a wreck. Our nursing experience was hellish. Really, it was. Bear wasn't gaining weight well, I was a brand new Mom with my husband 9 hours away. Tech Mom and Dad picked up us girls for the trek to meet Hubby at his sister's house and celebrate Thanksgiving with the rest of the family. I thought I had everything. Breast pump, check, baby clothes, diapers, etc., check. House keys for our return, check. Looking back, I am sure that my baby blues were PPD, and the stress of worrying about Bear's weight and our circumstances consumed me.

We arrived at our destination and realized that I had forgotten to make sure my bag was loaded into the car.

This year. Hubby is away for another training, which likely would not have been possible had he not gone through the first one 4 years ago. Thankfully, this time he was able to drive home Wednesday night and we headed to meet the fam at his sister's on Thanksgiving morning.

It's been a wonderful weekend... very relaxing, except for worrying that my kids might give everyone else their colds. I love that my in-laws can just "be" together. Hanging out, watching tv, listening to music, checking FB or blogs, playing some games, target practice, playing wii or a board game... sitting back and relaxing, in my case. I'm sure it hasn't been quite as relaxing for our hosts, but I am so thankful for them. Bear is playing well with her older cousins and adoring her youngest cousin. Buddy has been making less of a mess than we anticipated, even leaving some vases and other things alone so far. He prefers to climb up and down the stairs or look for the cat. The baby is about the same age as Buddy was last year at Christmas, and I can't believe how time has flown. How fast he's grown. I am so thankful that this bunch makes a way to be together for quality time, somehow, whatever it takes, at least a couple of times per year.

We have so much to be thankful for. God has blessed us with 2 wonderful kids, and in the midst of a lot of changes, it's nice to have a peace that passes all understanding when I am normally so accustomed to anxiety and fear.

another bloggy link
If we're friends on FB, you saw my status update about some friends from college whose adoption that seemed certain fell through. If you want to keep up with their adoption and church-planting journey, you can visit Emily's blog.

Little Joseph has gone to be with Jesus, after a hard life-long fight at just 14 months old. Please keep his family in your prayers. "He is all better now."

Dear Lord,

Please help me be a person who values relationships above circumstances; one who welcomes friends and family unconditionally and never makes them feel like they are intruding on something more important.

Amen.

Keep praying for Little Joe and his family.

Joseph and his twin brother Joshua are my friend Sandy's nephews. He has been in the hospital since birth over a year ago. The doctors are telling his parents, "it's just a matter of time." Yet he keeps showing his Mommy and Daddy that he has fight left in him. I cannot imagine the difficulty of watching such a little baby fight for his life since before birth... click on the link above to read their story on their Caring Bridge Site.

sometimes He uses the little things to remind us...

Do you ever pray for the weather to improve, but not really believe it will make a difference?
When I was in college, I spent about 5 weeks in Western Mexico... Sinaloa, to be exact. That's the state that is parallel to the bottom of the Baja Peninsula/Cabo. Well, Hurricane Rick was forecast to hit that area really hard. So a couple of days ago, Hannah and I prayed that the hurricane would weaken before it hit land. I haven't been in contact with anyone I met there since I left, but I think of them and pray for them fairly often.

Last I checked, it has weakened to a tropical storm. Oh, me of little faith. Just goes to show that God IS faithful, even when our faith is weak. Sometimes just asking is enough. In fact, sometimes we don't have to ask. Jesus intercedes for us. How amazing is that?

The family and friends Alaska cruise with Mark Schultz, Bebo Norman, and Joy Williams would be a good 11th anniversary trip... of course, we also want to try to get up to the Cape to see my relatives since I haven't been there in 15+ years....

hubby came home this weekend...
...and did not leave until this afternoon thanks to the belated Columbus. It was relaxing, and he even managed to get a little studying done.

A good friend is coming tomorrow and staying until Thursday, and then Thursday my parents are stopping by until late Friday on their way farther South.

sigh

I don't want to be Mrs. Negativity, but I am tired of hubby being away during the week. He's almost completed 1/4 of his training, so it is going by quickly. And I do have the better end of the deal... he got doused in pepper spray yesterday. But still, it's just hard. The kids know he is gone this time. I am making friends here, but last time I was surrounded by support, so literally. Neighbors, my parents within 40 minutes' drive, church family, long-time friends. I AM thankful that I don't have a new baby (or one on the way) to worry about. In fact, I've begun wondering if maybe two is enough. It is for now. We won't close that door permanently, so to speak, but instead of thinking about when we might want to try for a #3, I am zoning in on the two I've been blessed with. Or trying to.

We went to Kroger to buy ground coffee and more filters last night. Bear did not get into the car immediately as I had asked her too before I buckled Buddy in. She scared me half to death when I looked up and she was behind our car, a couple of feet into the aisle, oblivious to the car that had just passed. I yelled at her and tried to explain why it was not safe, and that she needed to obey and get into the car immediately when I open the door. (If you have kids, you can probably relate. Unless you are a super mom who manages to keep their kid on task all the time.) After I told her it would make me really sad if she got hurt badly, she said, "but you could have another baby." Huh? I responded by asking her if she would like another sibling. She thought for a moment and replied, "That would be wild and crazy."

She apparently knows that her Mommy is bordering on insane right now.

Like Bear's tutu? You could win a cute Halloween tutu set!

Decision made.

My sis got the tutu for Bear. It is SOOO cute! I am one of those people who is full of great ideas but usually lacks the follow through. SO I decided not to make the skirt myself. Well, when we had a notice stating that there was a package waiting Bear in the leasing office, and after the sweet glow of excitement on her face about having a package addressed to her, how could I make her wait over 2 weeks to open it? I was probably more excited to see it because I knew what was inside!

It turns out that the tutu works well with her gymnastics leotard. And a magic clothes hanger. ;)


Here she was, bouncing on the furniture immediately after opening:

Thanks, Bec and crew! Oh, and Miss Priss Tutus!

settling in

I am still far from having things unpacked organized,etc.., (and probably always will be). But our new town of residence is beginning to feel a little bit more like home. We've met 2 of the families in our building, as well as a couple of kids at the playground in our neighborhood. I'm learning my way around town, including some shortcuts. It's not exactly a huge town, but still... sometimes country towns are easiest to get lost in and around. Especially Southern country towns, in which there is no such thing as a grid system for streets and there may be multiple streets with practically the same name.

One thing I have always liked about the South is that it is easier to assimilate. People are generally a bit friendlier and less rushed, and things like holding doors open for those entering a place behind you, or waving at neighbors (even if you don't really know them) are not uncommon. Since we chose to live in a less populated area, that holds true. And boy, am I thankful. It's not easy to hear your little girl ask when she gets to see her old friends every day. Part of the reason I don't make phone calls is that they make me miss people more. Counter-intuitive, perhaps, but that's the phase I'm going through right now.

Anyway, while checking out the school of gymnastics, I picked up a brochure for a MOPS group. And decided to give it a try. I sooo miss the fellowship of my neighbors and friends back home.
I'm glad we went. The kids were well cared for, and I got a break.. some time with other Moms. Bear had a huge smile and a new pet rock from her craft time, buddy was good for his teachers if they held him. And I got a break.

Next... we headed to the castle park to meet some friends. This totally made my day. Bear and the 4 year old don't exactly play together all the time, but they get along ok, and my hopes are that they'll become good friends. The older boys watched out for my kids, Buddy tried to keep up with the big boys (and girls), and I am getting to know their Mom better each time we meet.

I'm so thankful.